I’m coaching a group of high-achieving female executives and in one of our sessions the topic of having career conversations with their boss came up.
It was interesting to me to hear that this group of intelligent, great-at-their-jobs women were fearful of telling their boss what they really wanted in their careers. They feared their boss might say: “No, you don’t have the potential for this” or “No, that’s not the path I have in mind for you”. But their biggest fear was that the conversation would backfire, sabotaging their chances for promotion.
One of the women shared her excitement about an idea she has for her next role - a brand new position which would bring more operating efficiency within her department and let her do more of the work she loves to do and excels at. She described it as a win-win for her and the company, yet she’s been putting off talking to her boss about it. She’s worried he will say: “No, not going to happen”, which will leave her feeling embarrassed and exposed, and possibly hurt their relationship and her chances for advancement.
It can be scary, uncomfortable and even risky to be honest and open with your manager about what you really want for your career. And not knowing how your manager will react is the #1 reason I’ve heard for putting off career conversations.
I know it can feel like a very vulnerable position to be in, yet it does not serve you to avoid these conversations. I’d like to share with you the reasons why you want to lean into the fear, the discomfort and the vulnerability and have the conversation anyway.
To get what you want, you have to ASK FOR IT!
When it comes to managing your career, you are in charge. If you don’t ask, you don’t get. And when you are honest about your career goals, your boss will know how to best support and advocate for you to ensure you achieve your goals. Remember, it may be your boss who decides on your next promotion and raise but it’s up to you to let him/her know what you want.
You find out if you and your boss are on the same page
These conversations let you know if you and your boss have the same vision for your career. If you’re both aligned, you know you’re on the right track and that feels great and empowering. Learning you and your boss are not on the same page is also empowering because it is an opportunity for you to clarify what you want and to make sure your boss understands where you want to go. Knowing where you stand is empowering and allows you to effectively manage your career.
Your confidence gets a boost as you push through your fear
These conversations get you out of your comfort zone and boost your confidence because you’ve pushed through your fear and done it anyway! They also create a deeper level of trust and respect between you and your boss and will make having future career conversations easier.
I understand the challenges that often arises when you need to face someone head on and have a (perceived) difficult conversation. However, when it comes to managing your career, avoiding these conversations can bring dissatisfaction, resentment and possibly derail your career. You have nothing to lose and so much to gain by asking for what you want!
Have you been putting off having a career conversation? I have a number of tools to help you feel confident and assured when approaching this type of discussion. Contact me for help.